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Louisiana Highway Department employees stopped at a farm and talkedwith an old farmer. The man in charge told the farmer, 'We need to inspectyour farm for a possible new road.' The old farmer said, 'OK, but don't get out in that pasture over there.' ...
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A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it's half past three in the morning. "I'm not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. ...
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A pastor's wife was expecting a baby, so he stood before the congregationand asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher'sfamily expanded, so would his paycheck. ...
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The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?" The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. ...
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Mr. Johnson, a businessman from Wisconsin, went on a business trip to Louisiana. He immediately sent an e-mail back home to his wife, Jennifer to let her know he had arrived safely. Unfortunately, he miss typed a letter and the e-mail ended up going to a Mrs. Joan Johnson, the wife of a preacher who had just passed away. ...
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One evening a father overheard his son saying his prayers "God bless Mommy, Daddy and Grammy. Goodbye Grampa." Well, the father thought it was strange, but he soon forgot about it. The next day, the Grandfather died. ...
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After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?" "Yes," the golfer responded. ...
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The Local sheriff was looking for a new deputy. When a blonde walks in to try for the job, he asks her "Okay, what is 1 and 1?" "Eleven", she replies. The sheriff thinks to himself, "That's not what I wanted, but I guess she's right!" ...
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A little girl was out with her Grandmother when they came across a couple of dogs mating on the sidewalk."What are they doing, Grandma?" asked the little girl. The grandmother was embarrassed, so she said, "The dog on top has hurt his paw, and the one underneath is carrying him to the doctor." ...
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There is an overweight guy who is watching TV. A commercial comes on for a guaranteed weight loss of 10 pounds in a week. So the guy, thinking what the hell, signs up for it. Next morning an incredibly beautiful woman is standing at his door in nothing but a pair of running shoes and a sign about her neck that reads, ...
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