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Jokes about "Parents and children"

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Old Josh was sat in his garden, sunbathing in the deck chair when he noticed his grand-son kneeling on the lawn with a worm. When he asked his grandson what he was doing, he found that he was trying to push the worm down the hole from which it came. ...
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When my son graduated from high school, he had to give a speech. He began by reading from his prepared text. 'I want to talk about my mother and the wonderful influence she has had on my life,' he told the audience. 'She is a shining example of parenthood, and I love her more than words could ever do justice.' ...
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One day, a girl walks to her mother and look at her mother's hair and sadly said: "Why are some of your hair white mom?" The mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white. ...
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The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present. "Who is the most obedient?" he asked. ...
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A small boy is sent to bed by his mother... [Five minutes later] "Mom..." "What?" "I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a glass of water?" ...
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A Father is asked by his friend, "Has your son decided what he wants to be when he grows up?" "Yes, he wants to be a garbage collector," he replies. ...
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Little Johnny asks his father: "Where does the wind come from?" -"I don't know." - "Why do dogs bark?" -"I don't know." ...
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Father buys a lie detector that makes a loud beep whenever somebody tells a lie. The son comes home in the afternoon. Father asks him, “So, you were at school today, right?” Son: “Yeah.” Detector: “Beep.“ Son: “OK, OK, I was in a cinema.” ...
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The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present. “Who is the most obedient?” he asked. “Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?” ...
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Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" ...
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